After Receiving the Ashes of a Deceased Person, You Should Know This

by admin

Losing a loved one is one of life’s most difficult experiences. Whether the passing was expected or sudden, the grief that follows can feel overwhelming. If you’ve chosen cremation for your loved one, or are receiving their ashes (also known as cremains), you may be wondering what happens next.

While this moment can be emotional, there are several important — and sometimes surprising — things to know once you receive the ashes of a deceased person.

Here’s what you should understand about handling, storing, and honoring cremated remains.

---

1. The Ashes May Weigh More Than You Expect

Many people are surprised by the weight of cremains. On average, the ashes of an adult human weigh between 4 to 6 pounds (1.8 to 2.7 kilograms), depending on body size and bone density. The ashes are actually pulverized bone fragments, not fine dust as often portrayed.

---

2. Ashes Are Usually Returned in a Temporary Container

Unless you selected an urn in advance, the ashes are typically returned in a basic plastic or cardboard container inside a labeled bag. This is temporary. You are free to transfer the ashes to a decorative or permanent urn of your choosing.

Tip: If you plan to scatter some or all of the ashes later, choose a container that’s easy to open and reseal.

---

3. You Have Legal Rights — But Also Legal Responsibilities

In most countries and U.S. states, you have the legal right to possess and transport a loved one’s ashes. However, some actions — such as scattering ashes in public places, national parks, or at sea — may require permission or permits.

Before scattering, be sure to:

• Check local and state laws

• Get permission if it’s on private property

• Use biodegradable urns if scattering at sea (required in the U.S.)

---

4. You Don’t Have to Do Everything Immediately

There’s no rush to make decisions. Some people keep ashes for years before choosing a final resting place. Whether you plan to bury them, scatter them, or keep them at home, it’s okay to take time to grieve and decide what feels right.

---

5. You Can Divide the Ashes Among Family Members

Ashes can be divided into smaller urns or keepsakes (sometimes called sharing urns or mini urns). This allows multiple family members to each keep a portion of the remains.

There are also options like:

• Cremation jewelry (ashes sealed inside pendants or rings)

• Memorial glass or artwork

• Keepsake vials or lockets

---

6. Cremated Ashes Are Not Hazardous

Contrary to myth, human ashes do not pose any health risk. They are sterile and safe to handle, made mostly of bone minerals such as calcium and phosphorus.

However, they can be dusty or gritty, so many people prefer to handle them with care or while wearing gloves — especially if transferring them to another container.

---

7. You Can Bury Ashes, With or Without an Urn

Ashes can be buried in a cemetery plot, a private yard (where allowed), or in a natural burial site. Some cemeteries have special “cremation gardens” or allow interment in smaller plots than full-sized caskets.

Some families also choose biodegradable urns for eco-friendly burial.

---

8. There Are Many Unique Ways to Memorialize a Loved One

In addition to traditional urns and scattering ceremonies, modern memorials include:

• Planting a memorial tree with ashes

• Turning ashes into diamonds or gemstones

• Launching ashes in a firework display

• Incorporating ashes into tattoos (with specialist artists)

• Creating a reef ball to support marine life

These might sound unusual, but for many, they offer healing and a personal way to honor a loved one’s legacy.

---

9. You Can Travel with Ashes — But Be Prepared

Airlines do allow cremated remains, but you must follow certain guidelines:

• Use a non-metal urn for security screening

• Carry ashes in your carry-on, not checked luggage

• Bring a copy of the death certificate and cremation certificate

• Check airline and international rules in advance

---

10. Emotions May Surface Unexpectedly

Even if you thought you were “doing okay,” receiving the ashes can reopen grief or bring a flood of emotion. That’s normal. It’s okay to cry, feel overwhelmed, or even unsure of how to feel. Everyone grieves differently.

If needed, reach out to a support group, counselor, or trusted friend. You don't have to go through this part of the journey alone.

---

Final Thoughts

Receiving a loved one’s ashes is a deeply personal and emotional milestone. Whether you choose to keep them close, scatter them in a meaningful place, or honor them through a creative memorial, there’s no right or wrong way to proceed — only what feels right for you and your family.

Take your time. Honor their memory in your own way. And remember: it’s not about the ashes themselves, but about the life and love they represent.